This post is for my single gals. Recently I have noticed many of my single friends spend a lot of time feeling sad not to be in a relationship. They are lonely and want to find a relationship. But being in a relationship is more than finding someone to keep you company, and more than someone to fill a role. A relationship is a partnership with someone who compliments your lifestyle. They are definitely not something to go in search for.
This year I have had three different experiences where the guy’s excuse not to get involved was that they weren’t looking for a relationship. It just wasn’t the right time. I agreed and even though I was silently crushed, I didn’t argue because there was nothing I could have said to change their minds. The last time I agreed and said I wasn’t looking for a relationship either, I realized that was completely true. I wasn’t outright looking for a relationship; I wasn’t on a quest to find a new boyfriend.
I learned that there is a difference between looking for a relationship and being open to one. And this is when I saw the change from loneliness to contentment. I no longer needed someone to fill an empty space; I was happy where I was at and was open to sharing my life.
Of course I was sad that “it wasn’t the right time” for the other person, but I was in a place where I could shrug it off because I was happy doing my own thing. So, instead of looking for a relationship, do the things that make your life happy. Then along the way someone might come across your path and want to share the journey. Stay open to relationships, don’t shut them out. Enjoy the time you have to learn, grow and love your own life. You are strong enough to enjoy life on your own, go on adventures, and let “the one” show up along the way!
There are too many exciting things to do; the time should not be spent being lonely. See this time being single as a gift to do the things you like. Don’t worry about when and where you are going to meet that special someone. Being content in your life and doing the things you love is more fun than longing for someone you haven’t met yet!